I sit here and think of all the things I could write about. I start some posts (81 drafts) but then in the middle I just get distracted or can't find the words and give up. The Blogging From A to Z Challenge is beginning soon but I have decided to opt out of it, officially anyway. I'll probably be lurking and may find some interesting blogs.
I don't know. I've just been feeling like I've been in a non-ending circle of life. My usual medical issues are frustrating more times than not. I try to think it could be worse and others have it a lot worse. I've been dealing with medical issues ALL of my 53 years. I just get tired of it.
Well intentioned loved ones tell me I need to get a hobby or go out and do something. I've tried volunteering but my skills are not needed. Besides, the way I've been feeling with medical issues have been an obstacle. No one wants a person coughing up a storm or dry heaving around them.
I have a friend who goes shopping but I hate shopping and I don't have 100s of dollars to spend either. I don't see any point in "window shopping."
Also, the weather is a deterrent. The last few years I've noticed when its going to rain, my voice goes out and I get short winded more.
I am NOT a domestic person but I know I should be cleaning and such but the most I do is laundry, do dishes and cook. When I decide to mop or clean bathrooms, I get short of breath and tire easily. It makes me feel absolutely useless. My poor husband works all day and not in the mood of doing chores either. I wish I could hire someone to come clean my house cheaply.
So my daily life lately has consisted of email, Sporcle, watching Netflix or Amazon and reading until Hubby comes home and then I cook, clean up the kitchen and we watch TV. I do go to the store a few times a week to get something I need. Hubby and I have date nights sometimes and we do go to family gatherings on occasion.
I guess our life is perfect in a way. No drama. No emergencies. No visitors although we had an invited strange one this week. Maybe it'll be a post later on.
Until next time!
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You sound like you need to someone to talk to that might help you find your way out of your funk. Or at least someone to help you find a support group for chronically ill people. I can only imagine how tiring it must be for you to always have to deal with one kind of health issue or another. Just because some others have it worse than you, doesn't mean that you can't feel bad too. Sometimes, it takes something or someone from the outside to help us not see the world through gray colored glasses. Your doctor may have some suggestions of support groups or counselors in your area.
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, keep posting on your blog. That's a great outlet. And it doesn't have to be perfect. Just write whatever you feel at the moment whether it's big or small. If you write what you feel, it will be good. Also, practice helps a lot.
Good luck. All of us out here in blog land care about you.
Thank you! You have no idea how much your words mean to me. And how much I needed to read them at the moment I did. I felt your compassion and understanding. I've searched for support groups but they all seem to be directed to a specific illness. I have talked to my doctor. He listens and gets me. He has recommended antidepressants but I've been there done that. It doesn't resolve my physical ailments. Thanks again!
DeleteSometimes it takes several tries to find the right antidepressant/support group/therapist that has a fit that's good for you. That must be exhausting to think of searching for more help when you already have so many things to do to maintain your immediate physical health. Maybe your husband or daughter could to some legwork to help by figuring out who or what is available through your insurance.
DeleteThanks sweetie...I'm much better today. I rather not burden my loved ones more who have been by my side. I promise I will actively search for something and pay a visit to my doctor soon who I am positive will direct me in the right direction. I also continue to try to listen to what God is trying to tell me. He is just not being clear right now :). I so appreciate your input!
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