Children's Safety Should be First

I have to admit I have made my mistakes in parenting. We all have made mistakes with our children.

But when I read about parents leaving their underage children alone or forgetting them in the car makes me upset.

I admit I forgot my child once, at school. That day was in service day she got off early. I was going to pick her up. But for some reason some time during the day it slipped my mind and I was thinking I would get her at usual time. About 30 minutes after the early dismissal the school called me and once I heard their voice, my memory came back to me. "HOLY SH-T! I forgot!" I got to school in record time and she was crying. She was mad at me for days and has not totally let me forget it to this day. I felt so awful. However, she was safe and that is the ONLY time I 'forgot" about her.

I can understand being absentminded. But when a parent just leaves a child in the car to make one minute stops at a store or go party or whatever they wanna do makes me infuriated. My first question is "What the hell were they thinking?"

I have witnessed my upstairs neighbor leave their child in the car for 20 minutes. The car is on so I assume the air conditioner is on but WTH? I have thought about calling the cops once or twice.

A mother in Louisiana was charged with four counts of negligent homicide for leaving her 2,5,7 and 8 year old children at home and their home caught fire. This is one of many similar tragedies that happen every day somewheres.

I just read about a mother who had been smoking marijuana who had put her child in the car seat on top of her car, forgot about it and took off. Luckily the child is not harmed.

But as I read this stories and think, again, "What the hell is going through their minds?"

I think, when my BabyGirl was a baby I never left her in the car. And it took me more time and energy to get her in and out of the car than some because of my cerebral palsy and other health issues. All of you parents with cerebral palsy know what I am talking about.

It just seems more innocent lives are being taken or threatened due to negligent parents or just pure ignorance, maybe?

I am sure "It'll never happen to mine" goes through their minds. It is sad their wake-up call is losing these precious gifts.

Some may say losing them is punishment enough. But I don't know.

Children are depending on their parents. They are trusting us to keep them safe and take care of them. Children's safety should be first and foremost.

Big Brother/Big Sisters-edited

I'm editing this post because I found errors LOL.

I stay home alot since well...I can't work in my chosen profession..so doctor  permanently disabled me. I have a significant other but he works and lately its been late. My daughter is on her own so I am here alone alot of the time. The walls of this apartment sometimes begin to close in and I need to get out.

So I started thinking what can I do that costs no or little moulah that can feed my nurturing craving. I sit here and think of the years I worked and how I loved the patients. I was a geriatric nurse. The elderly are so cute. I always said they were old bodies with young minds.

I searched online and in the newspaper with MyLove's blessing. I came up with Big Brother/Big Sisters program. I read alot on the site but was concerned about them accepting me as a volunteer due to my disability. So I wrote to them and the responder told me they took anyone who had a good heart and willing to commit. He listed orientation dates.

I asked my daughter before I went how she felt about me being a "BIG". She said she thought it was okay.

Although she moved with her daddy before she went on her own a couple of years ago, I've been having this nurturing need of late. I just miss her and the things we used to do.I definitely am not trying to replace her being a BIG. Those who know here knows no one can ever replace my baby girl.


Thursday night I went to orientation. A case worker just went over a packet which most of it was what I read online. It's a justifiable long process to become a "BIG". My next step is wait for them to call me for an interview. They do a criminal background check and absolutely check  references.

I am ready to make a difference in a little child's life. The case worker said most come from low income homes and abused. My goal is to be a friend to the child and make a difference in their life.

Let me explain the program is.

There are two ways to meet my Little. The Community Based and the Site Based.

The Site Based is a commitment for a school year. You meet your Little at the school during a non core subject and spend 45 min every week with your Little. We can talk, play games, read a book etc.

The Community Based is a commitment for one year with minimum of twice a month for at least an hour meeting your Little.

I think I may start at the Site Based and go from there. Site based can be converted to Community Based.

What's good is you can be a friend to a child in need. We are close contact with the case worker, child and parent.

The case worker also went through statistics of child abuse. I knew it was bad but it is scary.

It is estimated that 1 in 3 girls and 1 in six boys will be sexually assaulted before the age 18. That is so sad. I figured it this way. My child has two best friends, one out of those 3 girls could be sexually assaulted.

Abuse is done through manipulation, deception and bribery. It leaves the child feeling its her fault. How I know this so well especially manipulation and bribery.  I shiver thinking my child and I suffered through it but I think we are stronger for it.

85% of abuse cases, females are victims. that leaves 15% males. Regardless, its a disgrace!

Children rarely lie about being abused.

This is quite interesting: Abusers are not mentally ill. Only 10% of abusers suffer from serious mental illness or psychosis. I always said they were sick or a screw loose. Evidently most are not. Makes me wanna cry.

Approximately 84% of the child sexual abuse in the US is perpetrated by an individual familiar to the victim. Less than 20% of the abuses are strangers. That is scary to know someone near you could abuse your child, isn't it?

Children sexually abused between 8 and 11 are the largest percentage. Innocent children!

30% of sexual abuse involves alcohol abuse.  That is no real surprise.

And last but not least: The individuals who have experienced abuse seldom tell of the abuse. That's really sad and upsetting.  I sure hope if my child was, she would come tell me.

They told you signs of abuse and what to do. Quite interesting.

I'm looking forward to get a Little although I may have to wait until the school year begins again in September. But that's okay.

Ahh this is a much better post than the previous one.

Layla surgery/Special Needs Dream

Dream/Layla Surgery

Last night my dream that I remembered took place at my Granny's old house on the Island. Her kitchen backyard window was a huge drive up window. My mom and Aunt Sharon was in the dream but I do not remember their purpose.

We had Special-need kids come by busload. Some had Down's, a few had some other retardation, and some were physically challenged. The buses would stop in front of the window about 20 feet back and they would all RUN to the window making their preferences perfectly clear what they want.

They commanded, “Coke with Ice.” “Coke without ice” “Dr. Pepper” “Dr. Pepper with ice.” “No ice in Dr. Pepper.” Some just wanted water. We didn't have water. Their little faces told 'us' (I just feel there were some other people helping.) what they thought about no water. Some we convinced to try a Dr. Pepper or Coke. Some just weren't swayed.

Between busloads I would go into the living room to watch TV and before I knew it someone (Maybe Mom or Aunt Sharon?) was yelling bus is coming and I had to rush because for some reason we did not want them to wait.

You have to understand to get from the kitchen to the living room, you have to pass through a large dining room and bedroom. Her house was big but it was twice the size in my dream!

Reason I dreamed this: Hmm I've been thinking of Granny a lot and I guess 'reconnecting with my family on that side” is triggering things. Special-needs kids: Although I hate admitting it, I was a special needs child for my mom and it was so rough for her with society as it was in 1960s and the ADA wasn't around then. Also I was looking at a Christmas postcard of my long time cyber friend who has a special needs child explaining to My Love who they were. Maybe its telling me to get off my butt and join the advocacy for disability rights.

For those who don't know yet. Layla is having surgery tomorrow, Thursday on her shoulder. She has had shoulder problems for a couple of years and had surgery on it once before last year. The doc said 9 out of 10 patients do not need to have the surgery again. Layla is unfortunately that one that does. She will need to deal with her possible limitations concerning karate and her athleticism. Please pray for her recovery and her coping. Unfortunately, she didn't win in the stubbornness department with parents concerned because her father and I are both stubborn. I learned long time ago, do what you can and take it day by day.