If you, have read any of my posts or you know me well enough, you can gather, I've been sick all my life pretty much. I have cerebral palsy, lung disease and if its not one thing its another medical woe. I've lived it for 48 years and don't see it changing.
No need to be sorry or sympathetic. Everyone lives their life differently and mine just so happens to be that way. Once a Jesuit Priest told me that suffering is a journey to God's eternity. It's what keeps me going.
I love my mom and I know she means well. I know she prays and meditates for me. I thought, "well it won't hurt." After all, the last couple of weeks had been hairy and I wondered if God was calling me lately. Also if I wanted to weasel out of it, I would have to come up with something as I had absolutely nothing planned. So I said yes. So we made plans for me to meet her at her house (20 miles away) and we would go together.
I prayed last night before I fell asleep as I do every night. I also thought how I was so skeptical about these "HEALING MIRACLES" you see on TV, or the evangelists preaching etc. I know I can't be miraculously cured of all things but maybe I can get a step closer to understanding God and the meaning of all my whole life. I also had a notion that it was important to my mom and after everything she has done for me I can do this one thing for her.
Remember, we had no clue what we were getting into. We arrived and two pleasant older ladies were outside. My mom knew them, as she knows almost everyone or so it seems. They directed us. I was amazed how many people were there in the middle of a day. Of course, most were the retired elderly but there were some middle aged and even another disabled man walked in later. There were already about 3 classroom-like rooms full to capacity. There were 25 people in our room.
After taking a seat and as the desks filled in our room we whispered to one another. It was like I was in church without kneeling or praying but able to speak. One of the leaders, a medium size confidently looking brunette handed out a piece of paper and told us to write our Petition and put it in a woven basket. Father Manny will take them to Lourdes and bless them and pray on them.
I had no idea what to write, at first. But it ended up a half page. I could have written more but I thought I would be too greedy and I wanted him to get to others as well. After all, I know it feels to be bombarded with so many requests at once.
Another leader, this one a little on the heavy side told us after the petition, the rosary would be said and then the anointment would take place. In the other room, the rosary started and we prayed. After, they took the lights off and we heard soft mellow music through the speakers. We waited and waited.
I glanced at people who seemed they had done this before and some were reading a prayer book, some seemed like they were sleeping, some were obvious praying and there were some doing what I was doing, seeing what everyone else was doing. I realized this could be a long wait so I just closed my eyes, listened to the music and prayed, talking to God in my own way.
After some time passed and listening to someone talking in the other room. I assumed it was the priest. A different dark haired lady with a pile of small cloth entered. She was passing them out. She explained it was blessed by Father and we can keep them wherever we wanted. She said if we want to make it smaller, its okay to cut them in half or pieces Whether it be in your pocket, on your head, where you would like the healing to be done, head, chest, stomach, anywhere you feel fit. She walked around giving one to each but when she got to me, she accidentally pulled two and one fell on the floor. She apologized and said she couldn't bend because of her back as I instinctively got up and picked it up. As I thought, she verbalized, "God is showing that you need that little extra help." The room chuckled.
I am putting one under my pillow or in my pillowcase and gave one to MyLove.
After a short time, the priest, Father Manny Fernandez walked in informally. He said the prayer,
O Holy Spirit,
Beloved of my soul,
I adore You.
Enlighten me, guide me, Strengthen me, Console me,
Tell me what I should do.
Give me Your orders.
I promise to submit myself to all that You desire of me.
And to accept all that You permit to happen to me.
Please God, the Holy Spirit,
Let me only know Your will ... Amen.
Then he walked person to the first person. I was watching intently to see what to do. He dipped his finger into some warm-like oil and did the Sign of the Cross on both palms then he went to the forehead and he did the same thing...but something happened...I was almost freaking out...It seemed he was doing something to him as he was doing the sign of the cross as the person's head was falling back then when the head got into a certain position he mumbled something and went onto the other person.
The person he had just left stayed in that position. There was this one man that had his head on his hands in prayer when Father got to him and when Father did the sign of the cross, his whole top torso swayed and fell to his right side. TO me it was like he was going to fall out of his chair and I almost instinctively got up to help him but I looked at Mom and she just nodded meaning it was okay. That man was just limp with his eyes closed after Father moved to the next person.
I was nervous by that time and thought wow I want to be that limp. Father finally gets to me. With the warm oil he blessed my palms..it was soothing. Then he went to my forehead. I don't know any way to explain the feeling when he touched my head. He gently did the Sign of the Cross on my head and I found my head slowly drifting back as he barely pressed for a couple of seconds, his hands left but I just stayed in that position for a few minutes. It was serene. It was an experience I have never experienced before.Everyone was in their own little world until he left. Then we recited Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be and we were dismissed.
It was certainly spiritual. I recommend anyone to go. He goes to the Loffland every 3rd Wednesday of the month to do this. It is for any denomination of faith. I am glad I went.
When we walked out the leaders told us bye and thanks for coming and handed us another cloth. Stay tuned for the pic of the other cloth.
My mom treated me to Cane's and we went home. I had a nice visit with my parents. That is another story.
