Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Why I believe in God

I was looking for this post on blogger but can't seem to find it. And one of the blogs I follow posted something about Mr. Camping saying the bible says Judgment Day is this month. Here are my views on God.


My granny died in 1981 and I loved her so. When she was alive, I used to ride my bike down a long winding gravel road, up and down hills and spend afternoons with her. Several years later, I was having major problems in my marriage and I felt like I was going under. One day, I just had a panic attack and needed to get out the house. I knew I was going to hurt myself otherwise. It seems like my car just drove me to my little country church. I went to go through the door and it was locked! First time I realized a church can be locked. The priest was not there. I was at my breaking point then remembered my granny was in the graveyard so I went find her resting place. I sat there and sobbed talking to her for an hour or so. I told her how much I missed her and wished she was with us. I wished she could have seen her grand daughter and how I did become a nurse, although for a short while. I told her what was going on. I don't think I ever cried that much. All of a sudden I felt this whoosh go over me and I realized that I really needed to go get help and I went get professional help. Some weight of my heart seemed to lift. Things worked out differently than I would have liked at the time but I knew God was talking to me. He drove me to the church and steered me to Granny's grave.


In 1992 I had Layla and asked him every single night to let me live until she at least graduates high school. He has answered that prayer. Thank You God.


In 1993, I became real sick. I was pretty much dying, had part of a lung taken out, then had post op problems with blood clots then I had this blood infectition that had my fever spiked to 103-104, I was vomiting and my mom was with me. I remember her bringing me to the hospital, they putting me in a bed, IVs, my cute little doc looking at me with that concerned look on his face,and me asking for my now ex husband who no one knew where he was. Then I remember entering this real calm soft place with darkness around but I could see a light way at the end. It was like a cool cave and I felt so light. I was trying to walk towards the light and as I got closer the light was shining bright and I saw him, God with his arms opened, seemingly waiting for me. I wanted to go so bad! I was trying so hard to get to him. Everything was just ...can't describe it because there is no word to describe that feeling. I was trying to reach him and then all of a sudden, he put down his hands and nodded no and mouthed Layla. As my mom and I talked after, we can correlate what was happening to me spiritually and physically. After that incident I am not afraid to meet him. I interepreted it that he wanted me but remembered my prayer and he knew Layla needed me.


And the third time he came to me in anothe form. A couple of years back, I had another surgery and unbeknowst to everyone I was terrified. I know as you get older the risk of complications etc. The anesthiologist was having trouble putting me to sleep LOL. It was near Mardi Gras. When I finally woke up, the first thing I saw was this blond hair doll on a cabinet straight in front of me. I swear it looked like Layla. I kept trying to lift my head to see clearly and the nurse thought I was hurting and kept telling me not to lift my head as they gave me an epidural. My speech was slurred due to anesthesia. I told her no but that doll looked just like my daughter. The nurse looked at me like I was strange LOL. It was just a plain blond blue eyed doll with mardi gras beads on it. It spooked me at first but as I thought about it later. I realized it was God in form of a doll looking like a person I treasure the most, my baby girl watching over me.


God has always been there for me. As everyone else I sometimes question if there is a GOD, with all the bad things going on in the world, when I am hurt or sad or when it seems he is not listening without responding. I always lived with a favorite quote. God has his reasons for everything and he shows you why when he is ready to do so, not before..AND he never gives you more than you can handle (I've questioned that several times myself)


God has shown that he is real through my parents, my sister, Randal, each and everyone of you FB friends, bloggers, every trial and tribulation I've gone through and every rejoice I have experienced to name a few. You have to have faith. God Bless Everyone.

Is Judgment Day as Mr. Camping is saying or trying to persuade? No, I don't think it is. I think Mr. Camping is thinking too highly of himself to be the "Messenger". Maybe I am wrong. If I am wrong and the world comes to an end, I guess I won't see you after that day :)

4 comments:

  1. Amazing! God has spoken to me at a time in my life and it has made a huge difference in my faith. What an amazing God we serve.

    As far as Mr. Camping... I am deeply concered for his followers. Where will they be left standing with their faith if nothing happens on Friday? I pray for them.

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  2. Yes he is amazing!

    I shall pray for them too. It's a shame when you are looking for something meaningful in their lives and turn to those like Mr. Camping.

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  3. I'm so sorry to hear that you've been through all this. You're a really strong person. :)

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  4. Thanks for the compliment V but no need to be sorry. Everything is good and I have faith that God is with me in my journey.

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