Friday, April 8, 2011

Big Brother/Big Sisters-edited

I'm editing this post because I found errors LOL.

I stay home alot since well...I can't work in my chosen doctor  permanently disabled me. I have a significant other but he works and lately its been late. My daughter is on her own so I am here alone alot of the time. The walls of this apartment sometimes begin to close in and I need to get out.

So I started thinking what can I do that costs no or little moulah that can feed my nurturing craving. I sit here and think of the years I worked and how I loved the patients. I was a geriatric nurse. The elderly are so cute. I always said they were old bodies with young minds.

I searched online and in the newspaper with MyLove's blessing. I came up with Big Brother/Big Sisters program. I read alot on the site but was concerned about them accepting me as a volunteer due to my disability. So I wrote to them and the responder told me they took anyone who had a good heart and willing to commit. He listed orientation dates.

I asked my daughter before I went how she felt about me being a "BIG". She said she thought it was okay.

Although she moved with her daddy before she went on her own a couple of years ago, I've been having this nurturing need of late. I just miss her and the things we used to do.I definitely am not trying to replace her being a BIG. Those who know here knows no one can ever replace my baby girl.

Thursday night I went to orientation. A case worker just went over a packet which most of it was what I read online. It's a justifiable long process to become a "BIG". My next step is wait for them to call me for an interview. They do a criminal background check and absolutely check  references.

I am ready to make a difference in a little child's life. The case worker said most come from low income homes and abused. My goal is to be a friend to the child and make a difference in their life.

Let me explain the program is.

There are two ways to meet my Little. The Community Based and the Site Based.

The Site Based is a commitment for a school year. You meet your Little at the school during a non core subject and spend 45 min every week with your Little. We can talk, play games, read a book etc.

The Community Based is a commitment for one year with minimum of twice a month for at least an hour meeting your Little.

I think I may start at the Site Based and go from there. Site based can be converted to Community Based.

What's good is you can be a friend to a child in need. We are close contact with the case worker, child and parent.

The case worker also went through statistics of child abuse. I knew it was bad but it is scary.

It is estimated that 1 in 3 girls and 1 in six boys will be sexually assaulted before the age 18. That is so sad. I figured it this way. My child has two best friends, one out of those 3 girls could be sexually assaulted.

Abuse is done through manipulation, deception and bribery. It leaves the child feeling its her fault. How I know this so well especially manipulation and bribery.  I shiver thinking my child and I suffered through it but I think we are stronger for it.

85% of abuse cases, females are victims. that leaves 15% males. Regardless, its a disgrace!

Children rarely lie about being abused.

This is quite interesting: Abusers are not mentally ill. Only 10% of abusers suffer from serious mental illness or psychosis. I always said they were sick or a screw loose. Evidently most are not. Makes me wanna cry.

Approximately 84% of the child sexual abuse in the US is perpetrated by an individual familiar to the victim. Less than 20% of the abuses are strangers. That is scary to know someone near you could abuse your child, isn't it?

Children sexually abused between 8 and 11 are the largest percentage. Innocent children!

30% of sexual abuse involves alcohol abuse.  That is no real surprise.

And last but not least: The individuals who have experienced abuse seldom tell of the abuse. That's really sad and upsetting.  I sure hope if my child was, she would come tell me.

They told you signs of abuse and what to do. Quite interesting.

I'm looking forward to get a Little although I may have to wait until the school year begins again in September. But that's okay.

Ahh this is a much better post than the previous one.

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