Wednesday, September 21, 2011

God Give Me Strength

I know I said I wasn't going to waste my blog writing about the negativity my ex brings. But I guess its theraapy to write. Also my readers support me and give me useful advice sometimes. I would love everyone to read my blog but if some don't or don't want to put their two cents, its their choice. I'm okay with that.

About a week or so my ex called me. Here's how it went. Phone rings, my ID shows Idiot(HIS LAST NAME). Yes I DO have that on my phone.  I sigh but curiousity seeps in and answer, "Hello".

He responds, "Hello, how are you?"

I mistakenly ask, "Okay, you?

 He responds with the answer resembling fingernails scratching on a blackboard, "Oh you know,  living in paradise."

I bite tongue and say, "So, what do you want?"

I could tell he was trying to word it nicely so he started, "Do you know about BABYGIRL buying a moped?"

I say, "Yea."

He then asks, "Do you know she is planning on going to Houma to see (Her GIrlfriend)?

I said I did.

He then says, "How do you feel about it?"

I said, "Well, she is 19 and..." DIAL TONE. Every damn time he calls me or we try to talk, he hangs up on me. Lately his wife has been mediator." Poor soul. If he would have allowed me to finish, the rest would have been "I have concerns too."

But, I having faith in all people, have this false hope that it was just a disconnection and he'll call back. Right?

I wait for about a minute and call his phone. His wife answers. I was taken aback which really I shouldn't have been. But anyway, I said I called (Asshole's) phone. She said, "I know but you hit a nerve!"

Patience wore out and I went off, "Me, hit a nerve? I could not say anything. Listen to me." I went over exactly what transpired. She said, "Well I don't know". I heard noise in the background that told me I was on speaker.

She gave me their concerns which equates to mine but as I said, "WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? She is out from under our roofs. She is technically an adult." She proceeds to plead their case and I knew exactly where she was coming from but they were like me, had no answer.

WIFE and I had a civil conversation. Before I hung up, I told THEM since we were seperated, every single time (NO EXAGERRATION here) he called me, he hangs up on me and I AM TIRED of it. SHE apologized for him and I DID NOT accept it. I told her I pitied her because she is yet to see the side of him that caused us to divorce.

She shared what their attempts of resolution would be. I just told them to do what they thought needed to be done. I thought as I was hearing what she was proposing that they're going at it the wrong way.  But didn't offer any advice. It was more like uh huh, hmm..We ended the conversation shortly there after.

After I hung up I thought about the whole conversation. We all have legitimate concerns. I worry  and put her in God's hands. She knows my concerns and she knows I am always here for her.

I also thought about IDIOT. I thought why do I keep letting him in my life? There is NO reason to talk to him anymore . She is an adult. I hope when I see his name on my phone again I have the strength to just let it ring.

Do Not Allow Him In My Life.

8 comments:

  1. Sounds to me like you know that's exactly what you have to do. Unless it's an emergency there's no need right? Breathe!!!!

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  2. RIGHT BARB! I have not called him years, he is the one who calls me. Thanks for your support and being one of my faithful readers!

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  3. Ok, back up. This is about BabyGirl. Not him. Not you. Going to Houma...on a moped? A MOPED?!? I don't think that's safe, especially since she's already had more than one accident. Yes, she's 19, but she's still your child. From what I can tell even though the Evil Mr. Idoit Ex verbally abused you and BabyGirl. He still cares about BabyGirl, and from what I saw when I slept over at your house(trailer) a lot, he did care about her, just in a complex kinda mean way. Unless there's something else going on, I don't think he's worried about you or concerned about your life. He's worried about your (his and yours) daughter.

    And I'm worried about her, too. Your BabyGirl has been one of my best friends from kindergarten. I can't stand the thought of anything happening to her. I can understand getting on the highway to go to Houma in a car or on a motorcycle, but not on a moped. That is insanity. If it were me, I'd convince her to let me bring her to Houma and then go pick her up on Sunday but I can't because I don't live around Lafayette anymore. (but she's an adult) So what? Even adults make stupid mistakes, too.

    And uh, the thought of a moped going 70 mph on a highway is pretty funny, but you guys need to think about this some more. I don't want to see or hear about her getting hurt in another car wreck.

    Ms. Lisa, I understand you're upset about this, and I was upset and disbelieving, too, after BabyGirl told me you two had divorced. And I know from experience(to a lesser extent) that it's going to take a long time to rearrange your thoughts and get him out of there, especially since you were together for a long time, but don't misled yourself here. He wants to protect BabyGirl, too. That's why he's in your life because you guys share her.

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  4. You are correct, it is not about him or I. It's about HER. I have done a lot of things for my daughter including transportation. I am very concerned about her safety on the moped. I have talked to her. Why does she always have to travel miles? In my opinion, the people she sees there only comes when they are working around here or passes through. She is the one traveling all the time.

    You seem to have a solution. Well that solution is not feasible for me.I don't have money for gas and my car is old and unpredictable. It is so easy for people to say should've, could've and would've without taking into consideration the resources one has and the ENTIRE situation they mostly likely have no clue.

    We do share her but it doesn't mean I have to allow him in my life since she is over 18. I refuse to take any more of his abuse or have him interrupt my life unless its a dire emergency about OUR daughter.

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Also thank you for being my daughter's BFF. Love you Banana heheehehe

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  5. Then one more suggestion. When he calls, just say, "If it's about BabyGirl, then call her and talk to her directly." and then just hang up. I think that'll send him the message, right?

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  6. Hey, that's a good idea..You are so wise as you get older. Thank you! Love you!

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  7. My ex has the last name "moron"...It's great though that you and his new wife can get have civil conversations. That really is awesome.

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  8. I am sorry you had to deal with a person like that! Yea, me or anyone else can figure out why she hooked up with him. She is a sweetheart. Thanks for stopping by and commenting :)

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Go ahead say whatever is on your mind after reading my post. I'm not easily offended and even if you want to disagree. I 'm opened to any comments. If nothing else, say Hi. I appreciate all of you who read my blog!