Thursday, April 25, 2013

Anonymous Comment Response and Request to Felllow Bloggers

I am responding to Anonymous' comment:

I think everything composed was very reasonable. However, what about this?
what if you were to create a killer title? I am not suggesting your content 
is not good, however what if you added a title to 
maybe get a person's attention? I mean "Want To Be A Big Sister" is kinda plain. You should look at Yahoo's front 
page and note how they write news headlines to grab viewers to open the links.
You might add a video or a related pic or two 
to grab people excited about what you've written. Just my opinion, it could make your posts a little livelier.

My web page lung disease and exercise 

I do appreciate your constructive criticism and appreciate the advice and will take it into consideration. So I thank you.

After saying that, not sure who you are. I had conflicts of allowing Anonymous comment because of this very reason. And its easier to act like someone you are not.

I clicked your "web page"' thinking I'll see something about lung disease and exercise. But it isn't. It's a site for Disabled Dating. It was misleading. 

If you have read some of my posts, you will know that I am happily married so your dating site is not of interest. If you had a blog I could be.

I've received several comments I have marked spam from "Anonymous"' that has NOTHING to do with a particular post and it seems like it is you. If it is not, I apologize. But the writing is the same and each time the 'website' is given is never associated with my post or the description of the website.

I am responding to this onein this post but not publishing it because it really doesn't have anything to do with the post but I do appreciate the suggestions.

To my fellow Bloggers, do you get any comments such as these? 

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Want To Be A Big Sister

Two years ago I applied to be a Big Sister in the Big Brother/Big Sister program. You can see the beginning of my journey here

During my interview two years ago, I had asked him to be honest with me if he thought I would be matched. He assured me that I would but it could take a while because of the number of girls in the program is less than the boys and he didn't see my disability a problem.

Realistically, I knew my disability was going to make it harder to find me a Little. People can tell me anything they want but I know how people can be reserved, As a nurse I had to work harder to prove to patients and employees that I am capable of most things anyone else can do. And I can always improvise to do something that is more difficult for me to do.

After a couple of months, they had found a Little for me but before we met, she got sick and was postponed. I called a week later and they said they were going to look for another one for me.

I had not heard from them since.

Last week, I emailed the case worker regarding my change of address and phone number and requesting the status of me being a Big. I reminded him who I was.

He responded that he remembers me vividly.and thought I had alot to offer a child. He admitted that my disability was an added challenge but the main problem is that there are not as many as girls. He informed that he was going to have a meeting with his staff the following week and see if they can pull all their resources to find me a child.

The following week, as promised he wrote to be again:

I will place a request in to the school counselors to identify a girl 6-9 who faces some of the obstacles that you have conquered in your life. I am touched by your tenacity to become a mentor and will do my best to assist. We will aim to have a kid around August or September as our cut-off for making school-based matches is March. (school matches do not meet in the summer and we want matches to get a significant amount of time together before school ends)This is good as it gives my caseworkers time to search through the schools we serve.Please contact me in late August and I will hopefully have someone identified. I am again sorry about the wait and hope the little we find will make up for the time invested.

So please pray that God sends me a Little that needs someone like me as a mentor. I want to make a difference in a child's life.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Awkward Moment with Priest Because of Disability.

As most people with disabilities, I have to deal with ignorance. Some I have written about. Here is a previous post. As I have aged I let much of it roll off my back. I don't worry about it. You get used to it for the most part. But we are still human and it upsets us sometimes.

Sometimes I find it humorous.  I've seen people, both adults and children, staring at me as they walk not looking where they are going and nearly bump into something or trip. I giggle and think it serves them right.  Hubby sometimes notices and says under his breath, "Take a  picture."

I understand the curiosity. I really do.

I hear adults talking to each other, "Oh like at that poor girl, she is so crippled" etc. I probably could fill a whole book with a collection of what people have said or done. 

Kids are the worse. They are the loudest. They laugh, point and attempt to imitate. Sometimes I want to just go over to them and smack them. But then I remind myself they were not raised properly. It is really not their fault.

For the kids I have come up with some answers. They'll ask in different versions, "Why do you walk funny?" I learn to say, "God made me this way."  Which they don't understand either. Their attention span is so short they move on.

I hate attention to myself immensely. If you read my blog, you know that. 

This past weekend after mass Hubby and I strolled with the crowd to the exit where Father was standing. We just started going back to church and this Priest wasn't there before. 

We make our way and I shake his hand and told him I enjoyed the sermon. It was a great sermon. Then he looks down at my legs and says very LOUDLY, "Oh my! You walk with a limp. What happened to you?" I felt like everyone got quiet and turned. 

Okay, maybe not EVERYONE but some did. It was one of those moments I detest. Everything just blurred. And I am not one to have a quick comeback like I wish I would.

I awkwardly smiled and said"It's just me". 

He continued to stare at my legs, "Your limp is just you? What happened?"

I was not going to stand there and explain to him because 1) There were people behind us waiting for their turn. 2) If I told him he would have no idea what it is anyway. 3) It was one of those moments that I felt very uncomfortable and I was almost speechless. I wanted to run out of there.

The first thing that came into my head would not have been proper to say to a Priest.  So I just responded, "Its the way I walk."

Hubby didn't notice much of it because of the crowd and he sometimes just doesn't pay attention. He was holding my hand but I let go because I just wanted to get away as I could from the scrutiny. 

Later that night, I expressed my feelings to Hubby. He said he heard him but he didn't notice how embarrassed I was. He took it as the Priest being curious. I think he is conditioned as I usually am.

As I thought about it during the night, I because furious and confused. How can a Man of God be so ignorant?  How can this man so blatantly and loudly embarrass a parishioner?

 I talked to my Mom about it this morning. My argument was he is supposed to be the Man of God. He shouldn't have scrutinized me like that. She told me to remember that he is also a Man, a human being with his own faults.

For some reason I can't get that incident out of my head.  I usually brush incidents like that and move on.  I guess because the last person I thought would do something like that was a Man of God.

We won't be going to mass at the church this weekend because we'll be at a retreat. But what about the next time?  

Maybe I should hand him a print out on CP?  I thought about emailing as they do have a site explaining to him my limp and the way he made me feel.   But is it going overboard? 

Why do we, people with disabilities, always have to explain to people why we walk the way we do or why we do the things we have to do with a disability?  To COMPLETE STRANGERS, no less.

I hope you share your honest thoughts with me and if possible, share this post. How would you have responded?  Eventually, I'll get over it.  Did I overreact?  I usually don't ask anyone to share my posts. I figure if you want to share it, you will.  But I would really like as many people's views of the situation as possible. You can agree or disagree, any feedback is appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Thursday, April 11, 2013


My BabyGirl and I had our mother/daughter outing last night.  We had one of those laughing until we cried moments. I was telling her a dream I had. I promise you do not want to know the dream.  But I told her because I always tell her my crazy dreams.

It wasn't my 'ordinary' dreams like she being younger or can't find her, losing my car, etc.

She started laughing so hard that she made me start to laugh and then it began. I almost couldn't tell her all of the dream because we were laughing so hard.

It was a warming happy moment to watch her laugh so hard, even at my expense.

After we departed and I was on my way home and before I fell asleep, I started thinking.

When had we laughed so hard like that? I'm sure we had more like them.  Sometimes our drink was coming up through our noses.

I remember a couple of times when her father and I were together. He would do some things and it would put me into a laughing fit. It usually wasn't funny to him and he would get ticked off because I was laughing. I hope he has found some peace and able to laugh more than he did with us.

I don't know why I just wrote that paragraph. I thought about deleting it. But it's true. I hope he is finding more laughter in his life.

Sometimes MyHubby will laugh at something I say or do that wasn't meant to be funny. I kid him saying "You are always laughing AT Me" He says  what I say or do, is just funny sometimes. He says he'll never laugh AT me, always with me.  He is right.

I rather make him laugh than cry anyway.

I laugh at myself all the time. Many people need to do that, laugh at themselves. Lighten up.

I found some quotes about Laughter that I will close with.

An oldie but true: Laughter is the Best Medicine.

"I am thankful for laughter, except when it comes out of my nose." Woody Allen

"Laughter is an instant vacation." Milton Berle

"A day without laughter is a day wasted." Charlie Chaplin

"Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it".  Bill Cosby

"Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache, and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth. Forgiveness gives you back the laughter and lightness of your life." Joan Lunden.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

CAPTCHA and Comment Moderation

I always hated to have to type a CAPTCHA to get on a site or comment.. Mainly because the letters and numbers are so indecipherable at times. Maybe its my damaged brain but sometimes I can't figure out the letter or number for the life of me. They can be so close together or in some sort of obscure font, my damaged brain will not process.  I give myself a minimum of 2 tries and max of 5. If I go over the 5, sorry I'm moving on. Yes, I've come up with some of those ridiculously CAPTCHA's like that. Yes I change it and another crazy CAPTCHA comes up I just can't get.

I totally understand their purpose. But I still don't want it on my blog. I THINK, (I can be totally wrong. And I'm sure I will be informed if I am), adding one more step to comment can turn what could have been a commentator move on without leaving a comment. I have been one of those commentators that moved on occasion. 

I do go through the CAPTCHA the majority of the time especially if I like the person/blog. 

Recently, I've noticed some weird comments on my blog posts. After researching I figured out it was spam so I started thinking and researching.

I had seen Comment Moderation on some blogs and really thought nothing of it. It's their Blog.  It's their preference. It doesn't give me an extra step.

Remember I can be scatterbrained. I do have damage to my brain because of my cerebral palsy, you know? "SMILING"  I am so forgetful and I blame Cerebral Palsy for it too..Just kidding..

I know my mom NEVER let me use my Cerebral Palsy for any excuse to not do something. CAN'T was NOT in my vocabulary according to my loving Mom. I think I said it once or twice and don't remember the consequences. But whatever it was, I dared NOT say it, in front of her anyway. Uh uh. No way!

Anyway, back to my point.

I've noticed some 'advertisers' etc leaving comments on my posts, that I have deleted. It is irritating. If it would have been even a little close to the subject of the post, I might have left it there..but it was way off topic.

Therefore, I am sorry to say that I have initiated comment moderation. I apologize that you won't see your comment immediately. I do have it set up  to send all comments to my email so I  can approve them ASAP.

Thanks for your understanding, support and love. 

Home Buying: Chaos Continues, Lender

Last post I was stressed with losing my Walmart Gift Card and Bank Debit card. My day didn't get better. The mail-lady came later than usual with 2 pieces of certified mail, one for me and one for Hubby as well as 2 other pieces of mail for each, same company. 

If you have been following our atrocious journey in owning a home, we had problems from the get-go. As we look back, we can see where there was times when we should have just walked away from the whole mess. Unfortunately, we didn't. And here we are.

The original Lending Company who gave us our loan sold it to another lending company. Then that lending company sold our loan to ANOTHER one. I think our loan has been bought and sold at least 4 times since January. 

I think that is totally wrong, especially when we weren't notified for each turnover. Why can they change our contract just like that? And we can't? There is definitely something wrong with this industry.

I don't quite understand the whole process but thankfully Hubby does, at least a tad more. Even though the original Lending company sold it, they are still in the mix because if the company that bought out loan doesn't abide by their agreement, the original lending company can do something. I do not know exactly what.

Anyway, last week we also received a rather nasty letter from the insurance company for something because the lending company is not talking with the insurance. 

Since our original move in date was so screwed, it moved our Loan Due date. So our first mortgage payment was for February. Hubby sent it.  It was cashed. 

Let me say since the mortgage lender has changed so many times, it is freaking confusing.  Where we sent the mortgage payment, on the note, it has 4 different addresses and phone numbers. I don't mean same office. The BIlling is in Carolina, Tech support in Texas, and so on. It's absolutely ridiculous.

Hubby has called these people numberous times but can't get anyone. There is something wrong with their phone line because he goes through the automated but once it gets to a real person, its garbled and they are disconnected. He tried it on his phone, my phone and his work. He tried different areas..Same thing.

He has received threatening emails and phone calls, when he can't get to the phone at work. When he attempts to return the call, the call is dropped. I am not saying this happened once or twice. I am talking about 5-10 times, if not more.

We keep getting mail and stating we are in default  All four pieces of mail we received yesterday were the SAME THING.  Alot of wasted postage, wouldn't you say? They tacked on about $300 more dollars. It says it is now in collection and we could foreclose and lose our collateral? Excuse me?

Hubby keeps telling them they cashed the check and he was NOT sending another check until they found the one we sent. They told him to send a copy of his BANK STATEMENT proving it. 

My poor Hubby, who is normally a very patient reasonable person, refuses to do it. He asks (And I totally agree) why do WE always have to prove everything? 

I suggested we offer a copy of the cancelled check but not the bank statement. What is it with these freaking financial institutions?

Hubby has stayed in contact with our original lender's contact we've been dealing with. SHe is sorta the go between and she will get back with him after she finds out what is going on. We refuse to pay the note until they figure out where the hell our first note went.

I told Hubby, it might cost us more but maybe it is time to hire a lawyer for legal advice. 


By the way I did go to Wal-mart and I have to say it went smoothly. I brought them the receipt. They deactivated the old one and gave me a new one with my previous balance. It worked at the gas pump without a hitch! YAY! Finally Wallyworld comes through for me.

Monday, April 8, 2013

You Lose Walmart GIft Card---You are Screwed.

Today I trudged to do my absolute necessary hated errand of the month. If you have followed me I hate shopping and I double hate Walmart.

I go to check out and reloaded my gift card I use to put gas in my car. I also used my bank debit card to pay and get cash back. From that moment to my car I have no clue where they went.  I searched my car 3 times. Emptied my purse many times after. I walked back into the store asking the clerk who waited on me if she saw my cards. She said, "No, but you forgot a bag." It was MyLove's Orange Juice. He needs that Vitamin C.  She suggested I go to the Customer Service.

SO I walked to Customer Service and met up with this mean looking Caucasian employee. I asked her if someone handed in my cards explaining to her what they were. She snobbishly and grumpily said, "Not to me." I asked her if she could ask the others who worked there. She huffed and said, "I don't have time". Boy did I wanna Bitch Slap that Bitch or what? She walked away before I could get her name.

I came home depressed. I unloaded the groceries and saved the groceries HOPING I had stuck them in a bag. No Luck. I check my car again twice. Hubby checked my purse (Yes I allowed hm to snoop in my purse, otherwise my purse is off limits like his wallet is to me. It's just one of those unsaid rules). Still NO Luck.

So I called my bank and they deactivated my card and ordered me another one. My new one will inconveniently arrive 5-7 WORKING days.

I called Walmart Customer service. Debbie, the rep was very nice. She said I had to bring the receipt where with the reload to the MANAGER where I reloaded at and tell them the problem. They will give me another one  I told her what happens if it was stolen or picked up and used. She said that is why I need to go back to the store ASAP to let them know.

I asked if they just couldn't deactivate it and transfer my balance to a new one. She said, She was sorry but I had to go to WALMART again to do that.

SO in the meantime if someone uses it I am screwed. I don't have ALOT of money on it but guess where I gotta go again tomorrow. I wanna

Friday, April 5, 2013

Why I Rather Be a Homebody For the Most Part

Driving is one of the least likable things I do. If I can help it I don't go anywhere.  But there are times I have to drive like go shopping. visit friends and family, doctor appointments etc. 

Yesterday, I drove to Baton Rouge to see an old college friend which I enjoyed the visit so much and the long drive was worthwhile. Even the chaotic traffic was worthwhile.

As I was driving on the freeway I tend to stay in the lane where the sign of my destination  is posted. I was on the far left hand lane going the speed limit. Then a white SUV comes up behind me tailgating me. All of a sudden I see a blue light flash on the dashboard. Of course, my heart started pumping faster. But I looked again and didn't see any signs on the vehicle indicating it was a cop. I had no where to stop an wasn't sure if I was suppose to stop. So I switched lanes and the idiot flew by. I noticed when he got a head of me he was doing the same thing to all other drivers in that lane. 

Why couldn't he have passed me on the lane I switched to? Oh right..He was a complete asshole.

Then today I ventured out. I was supposed to go buy a gift, pick up meds, dropped off a movie at the library, go to the local produce store to get my fresh veggies and fruit and grocery shopped. I did everything except grocery shopped. 

I ended up doing everything except grocery shopped because to put it bluntly my legs were tired and I'm pooped.

When I went to the Produce store I waited for someone to back out of the parking space that is right in front of the entrance. I parked and as I was getting out of the car, I noticed a black male walking towards me with an angry tone but I didn't know what he was saying. I finally saw the Chihuahua in his hands. I guess since I was trying to figure out what he was saying I was sorta staring. As he passes by me he asks, "What are you looking at BITCH?" 

I guess I looked confused. A friendlier black male walking behind the meaner smiled at me and said, "He is ticked off because the dogs ran away and we had to catch them." I said, "OH'.  I was shocked and confused.

But after the nicer guy passed by I made my way into the store and a lady asks me what was his problem. I told her obviously the dogs ran away and he was ticked off. I thought he was talking to me and asked what I was staring at. 

She said she noticed him walking directly towards me cursing and she had her phone out to call 911. I thanked her for her concern. So I am not totally crazy thinking he was talking to me.

Folks, that is why I am more of a homebody vs going out.

Have a great weekend.